RESPECTING YOUR ELDERS

I am now realizing that how I write on the blog and all my experiences that I have recounted here for you all to learn from and perhaps for all the words of “wisdom” (gained through experience) that I share with you all on my blog, many people would envision an old woman. I have written extensively about my life and about getting pregnant while I was still in high school, and to be honest with you, I do not regret being so honest and opening up to all of whom I do not know. It is never wise to judge a person, I always say this, because you do not know what lies ahead of you in your life, and I was shocked yesterday when having a conversation with a blogger, she said that there are many people who read or peep on the blog who may not like me, (we were discussing the unfortunate event which occurred on the blog a few nights ago when someone came on and disrespected me), “not like me?” I recoiled in my mind, although I said nothing. The thought was something that never crossed my mind. In my mind, I see people who are free with me, loving towards me as I am to them, I never imagined for a second that people would read the blog and not like me. Then again, I have told you all over and over again that I can at times be naive, it is a small glitch in my astrological sign, I am an Aries and this is said of them, and for me , I know it is true. I do not think negatively at all, nor do I look out for negative things, expecting them to come. I know that enemies are around, but I am confident in my role as a being, (not necessarily human) and my attitude and behavior toward people, animals and also nature, so I know that no enemies can succeed over me.

The Laws of the universe I try not to break, this is way different from the laws of the bible, as I am not Christian, but there are a few there that deserves to be honored. I am a defender by nature, when I initiated Osun some years ago, I was given a brass spear, we in Africa call it Alagada. It is a beautiful brass spear, and it belongs to the path of Osun who is a warrior. I recentlyspoke to an Osun woman and she was surprised that I have such a spear, for there aren’t too many Osun women who carry such, and by having it, it tells someone who is knowledgeable who exactly I am.I believe she has a new found respect from me since that day I revealed this to her. As a child of Osun, I feel happy, light, great in my spirit, mind body and soul.

I am ever youthful, in my looks and actions, contrary to what many of you here may believe (I do not see how you arrive at the thought, lol) I am not  old, at least in the physical.I am still of child bearing age. I make this reference due to the disrespectful young lady who alluded to me being Lucy, the oldest fossil ever to be found. Yet I am an elder, I am! When I initiated Egbe Sometime ago,  along with my children, both my children, who are very good young ladies ( I tell the truth, I am not one to have secrets or hide, if they were bad children I would not mention them at all, because then I would probable class dem to the whole ah oonuh, ah just so mi stay, and I am sure you all realise it by now, I do not know how to pretend) were warned to always respect their elders.

The youngest one whispered to me that she felt funny being told that because she is never disrespectful ( and this is the truth), while the older one (who is very funny, as in ha ha) whispered to me and said, “Oh my God mommy, why?, old people are so annoying at times” we laughed together because she works with them in a hospital where she sees patients and says that some are hard to deal with, while some are so sweet. I however understood the wisdom of Ifa and why he warned them, and it was when we were alone that I got the opportunity to explain to them the wisdom of Ifa and why he warned them.

Old people, it matters not man or woman good or bad have developed as they travelled along lifes path and through their experiences certain knowledge and wisdom. They may not know it, but they are the embodiment of many things that they witnessed or experienced during their time on earth. The reason why they have gotten to the age that they are now and being regarded as old or an elder is because they have passed many life tests and challenges and have come through life’s obstacle course, which adds another year to their time on the earth’s realm. However when Ifa speaks like this to an initiate, or any persons he chooses to warn, he warns them to always respect an elder because of the Iyamis, witch people, elders of the night, night people, Iyami Osoronga.

Ifa sees that the initiate may at times be impatient or perhaps may pass an elder by without greeting them or see an elder who needs help and ignore them, or be rude to that person in whatever way or more, and perhaps out of a thousand elders who the initiate or the person have passed, one is an Iyami (witch) who becomes offended by the actions of this person and so problem can come just like that, in the blink of an eye you life ca be turned upside down,and unbeknownst to you, is the granny whom you pushed or cursed the day before was an elder, an elder, meaning  a witch. In Africa elders are held in high regard, no one passes an elders without greeting them. This use to be so in Jamaica where I was born, I am not sure if this is still like that there. In America, there seems to be no regard toward an elder, either one of age, or one of knowledge. Respecting your elders is important for ones spiritual growth and development. If you are on a spiritual path, and many people are not, this is something I am just now realizing, then the ego as I have pointed out before in other posts, has to be killed, and humility replaces your first name. Now let me just mention that whatever I write here is how I feel, what I know and how I live my life. I have no need to be pretentious.

What you see is what you get accept me as I am or not at all. My grandmother was very miserable, she would cry whenever my mother would take us to visit her in the country when we lived in Jamaica, but the next day as we settled in, she became mean at times and would “miserable up herself” , as how we speak in Jamaican. As old as my mother was, this was her mother and she would cry if my grandmother shouted at her, or stay quiet when the woman spoke harshly. I only see this now in Africa, this form of respect is dying out. Disrespecting an elder is disrespecting their heads and all who walks with them. It matters not if they are bad, and some are, they were not born old after all, and some have done some thing’s in their lifetime, but that is not our business for us to judge them especially if we do not know their lives. When we see them, we must greet them. If they need our assistance we must help them. If you see them standing in the bus or train give up YOUR SEAT.

In Africa when an elder meets you along the way they will pray for you, we say Àṣẹ or amen depending your religion, we want their prayers,because they have over time, developed Àṣẹ in their mouths and so their prayers are answered quickly. After my grandmother made her transition she visited me many times, warning me of wicked enemies and giving me instructions on how to help myself, had I not been a good child, would her spirit feel free to come and assist me or my mother?.

Below is an article I included in a post I made with the same title as this post; In the Asian society, the elderly are respected and looked up to. Unfortunately, in our society this is not always true. Older people in our society are sometimes viewed as a nuisance and not valued for the wonderful people they are. The medical community can be very harsh on the elderly by using the justification that they have already lived their lives. They tend to ignore conditions that would never be ignored on a younger person. My mother would not have lived to eighty-nine without my intervention. There seems to be a misnomer in society that older people are useless and have nothing to contribute Seniors are sometimes told that they are useless or just simply ignored. They are people with feelings that are a bit older and would like to enjoy the same respect and joy that a younger person enjoys. You see the elderly working at the Wal-Mart doors. They also work with the county to use their skills and knowledge to help the people who are starting out in business. They are the volunteers at hospitals (pink ladies). They man many of the soup kitchens and are an asset to our community. They are the Grand Mothers and Grand Fathers of our children. These people are our Mothers and Fathers, and they deserve our love and respect. They are the people who know how to get things done. We owe a lot of our successes in life to our seniors.

They are the ones that have gone before us to show us the way, (From senior service.co) This is from said post written some years ago, the words are from me Obara Meji; I have seen this new generation of people across the world, disrespect their elders often, although I must say I have never seen it in Africa, It is Our Elders that we learn from, the ones who pass down oral tradition, they must be revered! Growing up in Jamaica, when our neighbor Miss Will would make trouble, when she and my mother would argue, being very protective of my mother, I would try to join with my mom to curse Miss Will.  As soon as my mother heard me she would slap me and tell me to shut up, this was between big people.  Afterwards she would lecture me, telling me that Miss Will was a grown woman and I should never disrespect her, If I see her carrying bags I should offer to help her or if she falls and I am around I should not walk away, rather I should help her, the only caution she gave me was if she offered me food, drinks, or candy I should refuse, but do so politely. In the traditional practice of  IFA/ORISHA, it is not only important that we honor our elders by theirs physical age, but also by theirs spiritual age too, the wealth of spiritual knowledge that they possess and how long have they been initiates.  

When I travel to Ogun State, Nigeria and I go on my God Fathers compound, I immediately drop to my knees, and grasp his right leg, and  greet him while he prays for me. Parents we must instill this in our children, they do not say, Miss this or Mr. that any more. No Good morning, evening or night when ever they call or come around!! why? Where are the Please and the thank you. Gone are the days when youngsters did not curse in front of the elders. Shame!! What has the world come to, then is it any wonder that nature is turning against human beings.  There is a quote by James Baldwin that says; “Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they never fail to imitate them” I am a spiritualist/traditionalist. This is my way, my path, I came from heaven to earth to be who I am. I give respect to all.

The person who write here everyday, me Obara Meji, is the same person in real life. I give respect and I believe that I carry myself in a way to receive same. Spiritual people, ones with knowledge of what is beyond this world, true ones, are to be respected, they are your elders no matter their age. Respect them and see how you grow. Do not take what you have for granted or one day you will regret it. To this day I miss Mr. Mitchel, Mr. Pierre and my Padrino, they were not only my elders chronologically but they were my elders spiritually, and I respected them and loved them greatly. When I was in labor with my last child, Padrino was alive then, but we were not in contact, I saw him come to me dressed as he always does in full white, using eggs to clear me, so that I could have a safe delivery as I was under spiritual attack. After Mr. Pierre died, he came to me in a dream and gave me some candles of specific colors and wet me from head to toe with water, (it was his way of telling me that I was a child of Osun, at the time I had no idea, and he blessed me also while doing so). Mr. Mitchell came to me and smiled happily with me, just to show me how pleased he was with me. I have made myself accessible to people because I want to be there for whoever needs me, but I am now realizing that I am being taken for granted by many and have recently been disrespected by some. I do not deserve it, this I know for sure. The time will come when many will regret their actions, but I will be alright.

Tí orí kan bá sunwọ̀n á ran’gba. / If one head (a person) is blessed, hundreds others will be positively affected….Yoruba Proverb! [Success is contagious] Everything comes when it must, and everything happens for a reason, do not hurry your life, what is destined for you, cannot escape you, just keep the faith, be patient and be prayerful, filled with compassion, kindness and respect for all, let these qualities be among your name, God will fill in the rest…..Obara Meji! All religions are valid as long as it teaches peace and love….Obara Meji There are no disappointments in life, only lessons learned!….Obara Meji